Book Review: The Pale House Devil
A short and sweet read that is not to be confused with literature.
The Pale House Devil by Richard Kadrey. Narrated by Joe Hempel. Tantor Media, Inc., 2023. 3 hours (approx.).
When I come across a book that’s thinner than my little finger, I get excited. Time is something I don’t have in abundance these days, so a short and sweet read appeals to me. The audiobook of Richard Kadrey’s The Pale House Devil is under three hours. At 1.5 speed I finished it in about two.
Ford and Neuland are killers for hire. Don’t worry, they only kill people who deserve it, so it’s totally cool. After a “job goes bad,” which is a polite way of saying they murdered their client when he refused to pay, the duo goes to California. There, the cantankerous Shepherd Mansfield and his daughter, Tilda Rosenbloom, hire them for a special mission.
Did I mention Neuland is a zombie? Yeah, it becomes kinda important later. In The Pale House universe magic is rare but possible. In Neuland’s case, he’s a voodoo zombie. As such, he’s nearly unkillable. Through the course of the novella, he’s shot multiple times and is stabbed in the chest. The damage is magically healed by a potion. It’s never explained what would happen if he were chucked into a woodchipper, but I’d guess a second, permanent death.
Anyway, Mansfield wants Neuland and Ford to kill the titular devil, who’s taken up residence in Mansfield's beloved Victorian mansion, Pale House. He’s dodgy about the details, and the mercenaries suspect something is up. Still, they can’t refuse the offered $400,000.
The Pale House Devil is not high literature. It’s not any kind of literature. In fact, I shouldn't be using “literature” and The Pale House Devil in the same sentence. But that doesn’t mean it’s not an enjoyable read. Some of the best parts are the various rituals the mercenaries perform to capture or kill the devil. Even casual fans of supernatural horror will appreciate salt circles and cemetery dirt and so on. Also, the book is not filled with over-the-top action sequences like those in the recently reviewed Dead Fall. Don’t misunderstand me; it is an action book, but it’s more subtle … ish.
I could nitpick everything wrong with this novella. Cliches for one. The pacing for another. Yes, I appreciate that it's short, but some scenes needed more time to breathe while Tilda Rosenbloom needed more time to develop as a character. Kadrey didn’t have to spend an extra seven hours on these things, but a few minutes would have been nice.
The real trouble is a major plot hole near the end. It is revealed that Mansfield wants to eat the devil so as to “gain its strength” and immortality. That seemingly have failed, he settles for the heart of a zombie (namely, Neuland’s), which will accomplish the same thing. So why bother killing the devil? Why not just consume a zombie heart? Indeed, Mansfield knew that one of the men he had hired was a zombie. It seems to me he could have pretended to hire the mercenaries, kill them instead and take Neuland’s heart. Not to mention save himself the $400,000. A few explanations are hinted at, but none made explicit. There are two that stand out as most likely. First, it might be that the devil flesh is more potent than a zombie heart, but it's unclear. Second, if the devil were to escape Pale House, it would kill Mansfield. Thus, destroying the devil would eliminate that threat. However, this explanation fails to convince as the devil’s been trapped for decades without any indication that it could escape.
Nevertheless, shifting the story’s antagonist from the devil to Mansfield was a good move. Of course, anyone with a brain would’ve seen the betrayal coming. But the alternative - that is, the mercenaries kill the devil and collect their money - would have made for a weak finale. What Kadrey did instead brings both antagonists and the book to a satisfying end.
Short and sweet, The Pale House Devil is a fun read that one can knock out in the same time as a low-budget B horror movie. And much like a low-budget B horror movie, don’t think too hard about it or ask too many questions. Just enjoy the ride.
