Book Review: Check and Mate by Ali Hazelwood
It's a simple formula: make your protagonist flawed.
Check and Mate by Ali Hazelwood. Narrated by Karissa Vacker. Books on Tape, 2023. 10 hours (approx.).
From the zenith of No Place Left to Hide to the nadir of Check and Mate by Ali Hazelwood! These two books couldn’t be more opposite. Yes, one is a suspense/thriller and the other a teen romance, but I’m talking about their quality of characters.
Check and Mate follows Mallory Greenleaf, a talented chess player taught by her Grand Master father, Archie. Unfortunately, the family broke up and Archie died while drunk driving. So, naturally Mallory gives up chess. That is until a friend asks her to play in a charity tournament. There, Mallory beats the world champion, Nolan Sawyer. This unlikely event launches her into the professional chess world. Meanwhile, a romance - and a rivalry - grows between her and Nolan.
The key to a good character is empathy. The reader must become emotionally invested in her. We are rooting for her. When her plans fail, we feel the pain. When her plans succeed, we feel joy. One way to achieve empathy is to have the protagonist struggle and fail. Because we all have struggled and failed at some point, this is an easy way to build a connection. In contrast, the “girl boss” or “Mary Sue” is perfect and succeeds at everything she does. As a result, the Mary Sue is typically an unsympathetic character.
Hazelwood's Mallory Greenleaf is a Mary Sue for about 75% of the novel. The book opens with her defeating the world champion even though she hadn’t played in years. This is unlikely, but every story gets one coincidence. However, Mallory then proceeds to win or draw every single GAME!1 This is ridiculous.
Contrast it with Rocky. What made this movie so good is the titular character’s uphill fight. Without that, I don’t think it would be regarded as the classic that it is. Mallory, like Rocky, should have faced an uphill fight. For example, she could have lost more games than she won. This would have generated the empathy crucial to a good character.
Mallory is foul-mouthed, promiscuous, judgmental and arrogant. She is a brat, mean to everyone around her. Hazelwood seems to know this, and around the 75% mark finally gives us what we’ve been waiting for: a serious tongue lashing delivered by one of Mallory’s teammates. It’s satisfying, and it begins a series of mea culpas and self-reflection. But it’s too late. By this time, I can’t stand Mallory Greenleaf.
Mallory’s winning streak also sucks the tension out of the plot. Without the threat of failure, the stakes for this novel are nonexistent.
All of this is to say one simple thing: make your characters flawed. Have them stumble, fall and get back up. By doing so, you’ll create a sympathetic protagonist and a rich story.
Technically, she loses one game - because her opponent cheated, so it didn’t count.